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Joshua Stephens | 10 days ago

The Slow Burn: Calluses

Some things can only be learned the hard way.

As a writer, I wage a lot of wars against a blinking cursor.


I get caught somewhere between what I want to say and what I think people want to hear. And I’m beginning to believe that’s a dangerous intersection.


Some things can only be learned the hard way.

As a writer, I wage a lot of wars against a blinking cursor.


I get caught somewhere between what I want to say and what I think people want to hear. And I’m beginning to believe that’s a dangerous intersection.


Being true to thine own self is becoming a lost art.


We live in a strange time. Anthropic, OpenAI, Google and a growing army of large language models have put an almost incomprehensible amount of knowledge at our fingertips. Ask the right question and, within seconds, you can sound remarkably informed about almost anything.

I know. I use them.


As an aspiring communicator, writer, artist and entrepreneur, though, there’s something about all of this that bothers me.


I wonder if we’re beginning to confuse access to knowledge with understanding.

Because knowing about something and knowing how to do it are two very different things.


Elon Musk once criticized the MBA mentality by saying people can become very good at presentations without actually knowing how things work.

That idea has stuck with me.

With a few keystrokes, all of us can increasingly have the presentation.

But do we know how the dang thing works?


When I first got serious about tobacco, I thought I had a pretty good head start.

For years, I had kept cigar journals. Pages and pages of tasting notes, blends, comparisons, wrappers, regions, ideas, and observations. I read. I studied. I smoked.


Eventually, when the technology got good enough, I digitized much of that library.

Then I started playing.


What happens if you put this wrapper over that binder?


What does Estelí do here?

Could more seco balance this?

What happens if we pull back the ligero?

I refined. Drilled down. Compared. Researched.


Eventually, I had some blends on paper that made a hell of a lot of sense.

Then I went to Nicaragua.


I’ll never forget sitting across from our blender and smoking one of the first cigars built from my ideas.


A few minutes into it, tears started running from my eyes.


Not because I had just experienced some beautiful, poetic moment where years of dreaming had finally become reality.


No.


The dang thing was so spicy I felt like somebody had poured swimming-pool chlorine directly into my sinuses.

My eyes watered.

My nose burned.

And I loved it.


Personally, I’d smoke that cigar all day long.

Commercially?

Not a chance in h-e-double-hockey-sticks.

Maybe one day we’ll release it as some ridiculous Joshua’s Private Reserve and twelve other psychopaths can smoke it with me.


Until then, that cigar taught me something.

There is a chasm between theoretical knowledge and functional knowledge.

You can read about tobacco.

You can catalog tobacco.

You can ask AI about tobacco.

You can memorize growing regions, primings, fermentation techniques, wrappers, binders and fillers.


But eventually somebody has to light the cigar.


And the tobacco gets the final word.

Before my cigar-aficionado aspirations, I spent years touring the country as a musician.


The older I get, the more similarities I see between music and tobacco.


You can put five incredible musicians in a room and still make terrible music.

Everybody can play the right notes.

Everybody can understand theory.

Everybody can own expensive gear.

But sometimes it just doesn't move.


Then you put the right group of people together and something happens that you can't quite explain.


There’s chemistry.


One person leaves space where another fills it. Someone plays behind the beat. Somebody else knows when not to play. Years of mistakes, shitty gigs, broken strings, bad soundchecks and thousands of hours playing an instrument begin communicating without anyone saying a word.


Those are calluses.


And you can't download them.


Tobacco feels remarkably similar.


Every leaf brings something to the room.

Strength. Sweetness. Pepper. Earth. Cream. Combustion. Aroma.

On paper, they might look like the perfect band.


Then you light them up and realize the drummer and bass player hate each other.

Back to the blending table.


There’s another similarity between music and cigars that has kept me awake more nights than I care to admit.


Do you make something people will buy?

Or do you make something you believe in?

Some musicians make music to sell.


Others make music for the art.


I don't think those things have to be mutually exclusive.


I believe there can be a duality in marketable art.


But there’s danger in trying too hard to make something for everybody.


You can sand away every rough edge until there's nothing left to grab onto.

You can follow the formula.

Study what's selling.

Watch what everyone else is doing.

And make the cigar equivalent of a radio single.


Maybe it works.

Maybe it sells like crazy.

Maybe six months later nobody remembers it existed.

That question has followed me into Brolo.

There have been nights when I’ve stared at the ceiling while Kaitlyn sleeps next to me, running through all of it in my head.

Because we know what sells.


We know what retailers are accustomed to.


We know what sizes move.

We know what the safe decisions look like.

And we could make them.


But somewhere along the way, we had to decide whether the goal was simply to make cigars that sell...

or to make Brolo.


The hottest vitola in the cigar business is the toro.


There's a reason for that.

People like them. Retailers sell them. Consumers recognize them. They give you plenty of smoking time without becoming an all-night commitment.


So naturally, our original plan was to launch Brolo in both robusto and toro.

It made sense.


On paper.


Then I kept smoking the cigars.


Robusto.

Toro.

Robusto.

Toro.

Again.

Again.

Again.


And eventually I had to admit something that wasn't particularly convenient for the business plan:


The robustos were better.

Not dramatically.

Not in some way I could put into a spreadsheet.


They just were.


The blends felt tighter. More intentional. More complete.

They sounded like the band playing together instead of five talented musicians playing the same song.


So we changed the plan.


Brolo will launch in robusto.


Not because our research told us robustos were the hottest thing in the market.


They aren't.


Not because it gives us the widest possible audience.


It probably doesn't.


We're doing it because if someone walks into a humidor, spends their hard-earned money on Brolo, cuts the cap and gives us an hour of their life, I want them smoking the best version of what we created.

We only get one first impression.


Why wouldn't we put our best foot forward?


Maybe that's what I love most about cigars.

Tobacco doesn't particularly care how smart you are.


It doesn't care about your research.

It doesn't care about your spreadsheet.

It doesn't care what an algorithm predicted.


And it sure as hell doesn't care about your PowerPoint presentation.


Eventually, you have to put fire to leaf.

Then you find out what you actually know.

There are tools today that can give us more information in ten seconds than generations before us could have gathered in months.


That's incredible.

Use them.

Learn.

Study.

Ask questions.

Fill notebooks.


But don't confuse the map for the road.

At some point, you've got to walk the miles.


You've got to play the shitty gig.

You've got to make the cigar that burns your sinuses out.


You've got to build something that doesn't work.


You've got to change your mind.

You've got to develop some calluses.

Because knowledge might tell you what should work.


Experience teaches you what does.

And somewhere between the two...

maybe you make something worth remembering.


Light UP & Lean In


Light Up & Lean In,

Joshua Stephens

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Born in 1983, I grew up during a strange and wonderful time to be alive.


I remember summer mornings when parents encouraged you to leave the house and didn't expect to see you again until the streetlights came on. Nobody had Ring cameras. Nobody was posting

neighborhood warnings on Facebook. We weren't worried about the "big bad wolf" down the street. We had one family phone hanging on the kitchen wall...unless your parents were absolute ballers and paid for a second phone line.


Weekends were spent at sleepovers. We'd roam the aisles of Family Video or Blockbuster looking for the perfect movie. If we got lucky, we'd stop by Little Caesars next door and grab a Bigfoot Pizza before heading back to somebody's house.


Late nights meant MTV, TRL, Beavis and Butt-Head, and Twisted Metal tournaments that felt like they carried the weight of the world. Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness played through cheap speakers while we argued over who cheated and who got robbed.


Then, seemingly overnight, everything changed.


Dial-up.

24k modems.

The internet exploded.


Half my childhood happened before the online world. The other half happened after it arrived. The soundtrack of my life changed from guitars and arcade machines to the sound of AOL connecting.

You know the one.


Suddenly there were chatrooms. Screen names. Endless possibilities. Every conversation started with the same question: A/S/L?


As a tweenager, I found myself staring into a world I wasn't quite ready for.

I came from humble beginnings.


My Grandpa T-Mack…better known as "Smokey" Stephens…passed away around the time I was born. My birth father was never in the picture. My birth mother was just a kid herself, carrying a responsibility no fifteen-year-old should have to carry alone.


I spent time in foster care and bounced between homes before eventually landing with my grandmother, Joyce.

Joyce was a firecracker.


She worked at the county courthouse, where she met my grandfather. But by the time I came along, life had taken its toll. COPD. Asthma. Brain aneurysms. Most of my memories of her involve oxygen tubing and a wheelchair.


But none of that stopped her.

When she gained custody of me, she and her husband Bobby owned a little honky-tonk in East Dallas called The Junkyard Club.


To a kid, it was magic.


The place wasn't fancy. About 2,500 square feet. A full-service bar and kitchen. Cheeseburgers and fries served in hubcaps. Pool tables. Shuffleboard. An Elvira pinball machine. A Galaga cabinet tucked in the corner. Live music every Friday and Saturday night.


Grandma would bring me to the club after school while she worked the books.

I'd spend hours wearing out my wrists on Galaga while the cook fed me an endless supply of grilled cheese sandwiches. Every plate came with maraschino cherries.


The regulars all knew me.


One afternoon, an older gentleman dared me to eat a handful of jalapeños. Since Grandma didn't raise a quitter, I accepted the challenge. A few seconds later, I was sprinting through the bar screaming while tears rolled down my face. The regulars laughed. Grandma never looked up from her paperwork.


But the coolest thing in the entire place wasn't the arcade games. It was the school bus. After getting past security, you'd walk inside and immediately see it sitting on the right side of the club. A full-sized yellow school bus.


Somehow it had been disassembled, moved inside, and put back together as the centerpiece of the bar. Inside were booths and tables. But at the very front, beside the driver's seat, was The Table.


You could look out over the entire room from there.


It wasn't elevated much, but it felt like it was. To a kid, it looked important. It felt important. Like some kind of white-trash luxury suite. A little reserved sign sat on the table.


But here's what I eventually learned:

It wasn't reserved for the people with the biggest wallets.

It wasn't reserved for the loudest people.

It wasn't reserved for the owners.

It belonged to the regulars.

The people who knew everyone by name.

The ones who threw twenty dollars into the jukebox and played Creedence Clearwater Revival until everyone else was sick of hearing it.

The ones who showed up.


Again.

And again.

And again.


They had earned a seat at the table simply because they were part of the story.

Early in the evenin', just about supper time...

Down on the corner, out in the street...

Willy and the Poor Boys are playin'...


That was our place.


A place to know people and be known by them. As a kid, I didn't have the words for it. I just knew it felt different.


The smell of cigarette smoke hanging in the air.

The beer-soaked bar mats.

The sound of live music echoing through the room.

The laughter.

The conversations.

The feeling of belonging.

I felt connected.


When my grandfather died from cancer, Grandma sold the club. Eventually the building became something else. These days it's called The Lone Star Cafe. It's still there.


Back before I got sober, I'd stop by every December 21st…Joyce's birthday. I'd order her favorite drink. A margarita. No mix. Just tequila, fresh lime juice, a salted rim, and a lime wedge. Then I'd feed a few dollars into the jukebox and play CCR.


The school bus is long gone now. But when I close my eyes, I can still see it.


The band is playing. People are laughing. Someone just beat my high score on Galaga. Another guy is staring at Elvira. Pool sharks are running the tables. Sherry the bartender slides me another cup of maraschino cherries.


For a moment, life is exactly as it should be.


That's what Back Booth is about.


Back Booth is our boldest core cigar. A 5x50 Robusto wrapped in Mexican San Andrés. Medium-plus in strength. Full of character. Rich, dark, and unapologetic. My friend Austin described it as tasting like the best barbecue bark he'd ever had. Granted, he's from New York, so we'll take that review with a grain of salt.


But he wasn't wrong.


Because barbecue and cigars have a lot in common. Neither can be rushed. The best briskets aren't built in minutes. The best friendships aren't either. Both require time, patience, smoke, and a willingness to stay put longer than everyone else.


That's what the Back Booth represents.

Not exclusivity.

Not VIP status.

Not some velvet-rope version of cigar culture.

It's a seat that's available to everyone.

But it takes time to appreciate why it's special.

It's for the people who understand that the best conversations happen after everyone else has gone home.

The ones who know that community isn't built overnight.

The ones who keep showing up.

Again.

And again.

And again.

So pull up a chair.

Look out over the driver's seat.

Watch the crowd.

Catch the glow of the neon signs.

Listen as some up-and-coming band works their tail off trying to move the room.

Then take a look at the person sitting across from you.

Because moments like those don't last forever.

And that's exactly what makes them worth savoring.

So Light Up & Lean In.

Enjoy the moment because the "good 'ole days," well…you don't know you are in them until they are gone.

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