The Slow Burn: The Gospel According to Tony Stark

Now, I’ve never really been into Marvel movies or comics. Sure, I had friends who collected them. We’d hit the arcade next door, burn through quarters, and then wander over to the comic shop to kill time before the next round of Street Fighter. It wasn’t the stories that hooked me…it was the camaraderie.

That said, there was one game I couldn’t stay away from at the arcade: Marvel Super Heroes. You’d drop in a quarter, grab the joystick, and pick your champion. There were plenty of options…Hulk, Spider-Man, Captain America, but every time, I chose Tony Stark. Iron Man.

At first, it was superficial. I liked the suit. I liked the sound of those plasma bursts. I liked how clean the animations looked as his repulsors fired from his hands. But over time, I realized something deeper. Tony Stark wasn’t just a superhero. He was human. And his humanity, his pride, his arrogance, and his flaws were what made him relatable.

He wasn’t born special. He wasn’t injected with super serum. He didn’t fall into a vat of radioactive waste or get bitten by a spider. He was a man…smart, broken, and self-assured enough to think he could fix the world by his own power.

Sound familiar?


If you strip away the suit, Tony Stark is a mirror. He’s every man who’s ever believed that if he just works hard enough, grinds long enough, innovates big enough, he can save himself, maybe even save others along the way.

That’s the American dream, right? Be your own man. Build your empire. Pull yourself up by your bootstraps.

But here’s the catch: the same self-reliance that makes us strong can also make us brittle.

In Iron Man 1, Tony builds the first suit out of desperation. He’s trapped in a cave, wounded, forced to reckon with the sins of his own creation, weapons made by his hands that have caused untold suffering. So he builds something to protect himself.

It’s noble, in a way. Resourceful. Ingenious.
But it’s also the beginning of his prison.

Because after the cave, Tony never stops building. He doesn’t build out of inspiration; he builds out of fear. Fear of losing control. Fear of failure. Fear of needing anyone else.

And brother, that’s the same lie the enemy sells us every day:
“You’ve got this. You don’t need anyone else.”


For years, I believed that lie.

I thought if I worked hard enough, that if I grinded enough, it would somehow fill the void. But success doesn’t heal the soul. It just gives you fancier distractions.

Tony’s story is the same. He tries to control the chaos around him. He builds armies of suits. He creates Ultron to “protect humanity.” He even signs his name on the Sokovia Accords, thinking he can legislate morality. But behind all that invention is insecurity.

That’s what sin does. Our flesh feels powerful, but our spirit feels painfully alone.

In Proverbs 27:17, it says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”

The truth is, Tony Stark doesn’t have iron sharpening him. He is iron…blunt, unrefined, constantly grinding against himself. No accountability. No surrender. No brotherhood.

And when a man isolates himself in the name of “strength,” he becomes his own god.


One of the most haunting lines from Avengers: Age of Ultron is when Tony says, “I don’t want to hear the ‘man who died for nothing’ speech.”

He’s talking about sacrifice. He’s talking about avoiding failure. But what he’s really doing is confessing his fear, the fear of death, the fear of insignificance, the fear that all his striving is for nothing.

We’ve all been there.

There’s a Tony Stark in every man…the version of us that wants to control everything because surrender feels like death.

But here’s the paradox:
In Christ, surrender is life.

When Jesus said, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me” (Luke 9:23), He wasn’t talking about martyrdom; He was talking about dying to the illusion of control.

Tony builds armor to save himself.
Jesus removes it to save the world.


I think about this a lot when I sit down to smoke.

The brotherhood of the leaf has a rhythm to it, one that’s slow, intentional, reflective. It’s not just about cigars; it’s about connection. You learn pretty quickly that no smoke is the same when you share it with brothers who sharpen you.

Tony Stark never had that.
And when he finally found it, in the Avengers, it was messy. Loud. Full of ego clashes and trust issues.
Sound familiar?

That’s the church, man.

Community isn’t clean. Accountability isn’t comfortable. But it’s where growth happens. It’s where the rough edges are refined, where the iron starts to shine.

The Apostle Paul writes in Galatians 6:2, “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

If Tony Stark had understood that verse, Ultron would’ve never been born.

When we carry our burdens alone, they crush us. When we share them, we find strength, not in self-sufficiency, but in surrender.


Here’s the thing about iron…it’s strong, but it’s not invincible. When exposed to enough heat, it melts.

That’s what happens to Tony. Over time, the fire of his own ambition softens him. You see it in Endgame. The armor’s still there, but the man inside is different. Humbled. Tired. A little wiser.

That’s sanctification, brother.

It’s the process of being refined by fire. Of realizing that strength isn’t found in resistance, but in obedience.

When Tony lays down his life at the end, snapping his fingers to save everyone else, it’s poetic. It’s the first time he does something completely selfless. It’s his version of “Not my will, but Yours be done.”

That’s the beauty of redemption: even the most stubborn hearts can be reshaped in the fire.


In the same way Tony built armor to protect himself, we all do it…emotional armor, spiritual armor, relational armor. We use humor, success, pride, or intellect as shields.

But Ephesians 6 tells us there’s a better kind of armor:

“Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.”

That armor doesn’t come from self-manufactured metal. It comes from truth, righteousness, faith, salvation, and the Spirit.

The key difference?
Tony’s armor isolates him.
God’s armor equips us to connect, to fight together.

When I look at the Brolo community, the fellowship of the leaf, the brothers and sisters leaning in over smoke and story, I see the opposite of Tony’s cave. I see people stepping into light. Accountability isn’t glamorous. It’s not Instagram-worthy. It’s usually uncomfortable, awkward, and raw. But that’s where the transformation happens.

When I was at my lowest, I had brothers who didn’t let me stay there. They called me out. They prayed with me. They checked on me. They loved me enough to hold me accountable.

It’s easy to admire Iron Man’s genius, but I’m more interested in his redemption, in the slow burn that turned ego into empathy.

That’s the same fire I feel when I light a cigar with a brother who knows my story, the kind of connection that doesn’t require armor.

Because in the end, iron doesn’t stay iron forever. It gets shaped. It gets sharpened. It gets stronger in the fire.

And so do we.

We all have our suits.
We all have our caves.
We all have moments where we try to play god with our lives.

But thank God for grace.

Grace doesn’t demand perfection; it invites honesty. It asks us to take off the helmet, to be seen, to admit that we can’t save ourselves.

Tony Stark died saving others.
Jesus Christ rose so we could live.

That’s the difference between redemption through self and salvation through surrender.

At Brolo, we Light Up & Lean In because it’s not about the armor. It’s about the fire that refines us, the fellowship that keeps us grounded, accountable, and human.

So, here’s to the brothers who keep you honest.
The ones who tell you when your pride is showing.
The ones who sit in the ashes with you until the smoke clears.

Because iron sharpens iron, and together, we burn brighter.